Anti-Gun Activists Finally Able to Pry Rifle from His 'Cold, Dead Hands'

BEVERLY HILLS, California--In what can only be viewed as a resounding victory in the war on violent crime, long-time NRA spokesman and actor Charleton Heston set sail for the "great armory in the sky," his official blog says.

Heston, a vehement supporter of the Second Amendment, died earlier this week in his Beverly Hills mansion. He is survived by his wife, their two children, and "a gun collection that rivals every member of the Michigan Militia combined," according to a source.

A spokesman for the 84 year-old actor's family noted, "[His] efforts in both film and politics were in-part responsible for launching the Golden-age of American cinema, as well as the lesser appreciated Golden-age of American gun violence. His legacy is sure to live on."